Waiting

I've definitely debated talking about this on here, and we'll see how it goes, but after reading Paul Tripp's amazing article over at The Gospel Coalition (READ IT, Y'ALL!), I thought it would be appropriate to talk about what I'm doing most in my life right now - waiting. I graduated from college in November and had a job interview in Chicago three weeks later. I was going places. I felt confident about this job and I felt confident in my interview and in the weekend of job shadowing I did. Not only that, but I loved it. It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. Every single second of it was just sharing Christ's love to the broken in Chicago. How amazing is that, right?

Well, if I got the job I was to report to Chicago on May 19th. It was a summer position, but it was something to get me to Chicago and fulfill a dream of mine which is to live there. I got the horribly nonchalant phone call on January 11th stating that I would not be needed. I didn't think that answer would come, or this soon. Everything seemed set up perfectly. Not getting this job rarely entered my mind because God seemingly was just making everything fall into place, but alas it was not be. My plan before I didn't get Chicago was to substitute teach in the Spring and leave in May. Well, it looks like I'll be staying in Shreveport for a while. It's not that there aren't other opportunities in Chicago. There definitely are and I've looked into some, but not getting this particular one really, really took the wind out of my sails. Chicago will be there for as long as I live and I will call that place "home" someday. I know this. But now I'm stuck reassessing where to go from here and looking for a good job in town. And there is a job I want, I've been told "I wish we could use you here." but the money just isn't there for this job. It's tough looking for a job, when there's one you want and could most likely get. Ya know? So I wait. This, by the way, is just one aspect of me waiting. Remember when I said I had like 4 life questions staring at me straight in the face? This is one of them.

I'll get a job, eventually. I know this. I'll move out, hopefully. And by Christmas, I pray, all will be right in the world once again. And it's odd that I use that phrase because after all that's happened in the past two months, I truly do feel like all is right in the world right now for me, even though I'm not being such a Positive Pete. I'm the happiest I've ever been. I feel like my faith is the strongest its ever been. But that doesn't mean I'm not the most frustrated I've ever been. To steal a line from someone I know, "Growing up is so much fun!"